When you don't understand absolutely nothing is paradoxically just when you start to understand.

But im not learning, im not understanding, im not feelin glad. I`ve just lost everything i've thought i've won, and the worst point in this fuzzy topic is i don't know what i've won. And this empty night, i feel like loneliness is my new best friend, and is here for the rest of my life. And i have no forces for changing it. I have no time.

All my passions have just flown away with my no-meaning words. Speaking some different idiom for saying so many truths its just one way to deny all my feelings. And i love denying more than talking to you.

No offence, but you're really mean. Youre unable to do all stuff you have to do. Im unable to admit all stuff im feeling about you. But we are happy ones, with big smiles and the nicest memories from us childhood. And i dont know how to say it, but the sense of knowing you from a lot of years ago, is beating on my heart, making me dumb, crazy, hysterical, and lost. Completely lost. I want to scream more than be embracing you. But im not sure. Cause perhaps its just this moment. Perhaps tomorrow i'll hate you with the black side of my soul.

And no one's as jealous as me. Not being proud of myself.